I'm too small,help-USUK-Awful AU 292
by Orangecatchan
Summary: Based on an AU from a Tumblr-Blog. USUK-Awful AU #292 "You've been asking for help finding things in the store I work in all afternoon and every time you do it's always something literally two feet away from you so now I'm starting to wonder if this is something you're doing on purpose." AU Coverart: Tumblruser kibumchi


USUK-Awful AU #292

"You've been asking for help finding things in the store I work in all afternoon and every time you do it's always something literally two feet away from you so now I'm starting to wonder if this is something you're doing on purpose." AU

Another boring day at work. Fucking fantastic. There were so many things on Alfred's mind that he would rather do.

Like, everything else.

Eating, eating a lot. Drinking something, even something as bland as water.

Hell, he would even prefer studying over working at his part-time job.

Because helping old ladies getting something from the top-shelve wasn't really one of his hobbies.

Sure, doing such a heroic deed was awesome, but since no one appreciated him for doing it, it wasn't all that special and most of the time just super dull.

And for some reason, he had been instructed to wear a shirt that had the words 'Too high for you? I will gladly stretch my arms out to get it for you' on it. To make sure nobody thought this was just a really lame shirt on a awesome guy, the manager gave him a name tag and a hat with the name of the supermarket as well. And a pay-raise. And longer breaks. And he started to creep him out with his kindness ever since then.

What the hell?

Not that Alfred minded getting more money, of course not, but he didn't see why.

And ever since he wore that shirt, at last 10 costumers, mostly women and some men, asked him to get something from a shelf. And some of them gasped really loudly, mostly the girls, when he had to get something from the top-shelf.

The weirdest part about all this was that the stuff up there was always expensive, but not something that was actually worth the price.

Not that he really cared, he just shrugged and did what he was told to and everybody seemed happy about it. And the costumers who asked him to stretch almost always turned into regular costumers.

But when he was busy and suggested asking one of his peers to get something for them, the costumers demanded Alfred would have to do it.

Alfred sighed. The last weeks it started to get really out of hand. And he just couldn't understand why everybody decided to bother him.

He sighed as he saw a small guy, about his age, approaching him.

It was a blonde with bushy eyebrows, green eyes and a bulky, dark green, sweater.

The man stopped in front of him and looked at the floor, then back to him, than at the highest shelf

and then back to him.

Alfred sighed again. What now? Just another person who seemed to love the super-disgusting cookies from the top shelf?

And why was he so nervous?

And maybe just a bit cute?

Wait, what?

The taller blond rubbed the beck of his head, now nervous as well, and laughed.

''Hello Sir, at welcome at our store. Do you need any help?''

The green eyed cutie coughed slightly and then said.

''Yes, erm...can you get me one of the items on the top-shelve? Please? Th...that would be really nice.''

Alfred smiled a bit at the stuttering male.

How cute.

It truly was cute and as he stretched his arms to get the item his t-shirt slid up a bit, exposing his abs.

And then the cutie sighed.

No, it wasn't a sigh, more like a mixture of a whimper, a moan and a sigh.

How strange.

''Are you okay, Sir? Here is your item''

Alfred handed the small guy the disgusting cookies and smiled at him.

He took them and blushed, coughing again.

''Yes, jolly good, thank you''

Oh, so he was probably British? Alfred found it kind of...hot.

He didn't even now why, but right now, the smaller males accent seemed hot. And cute.

Just what was wrong with him?

Why was he getting so flustered because of a costumer?

Alfred looked away as if he was searching for another costumer to hide his own blush and noticed that the other blonde was gone.

He slouched his shoulders. Not getting to know the man better made him feel a bit sad, especially since he had the hots for him.

But not nearly two minutes latter, he felt a finger tipping on his shoulder.

After turning around to face the source of it, he saw the little guy again.

''Yes?''

The maybe-a-brit coughed again and looked into Alfred eyes, blinking several times.

''C...Can I request your help again?''

Alfred ruffled his hair and earned himself a peep. He quickly pulled back his hand and wondered if he had gone too far.

''Oh, sorry dude''

The hottie looked up at him, his face having a sort of dreamy expression on it.

''No, it's okay.

Alfred patted his back and gave him another warm smile.

''Sure thing, honey. Er... I mean sure, Sir''

The American mentally smacked his head.

Oh god, now he was openly flirting with the guy and he didn't even know whether he was bi or gay.

Or asexual. Or available. Or single. Or married. Or a ghost. Or annoyed, because Alfred made a complete clown out of himself.

But the blonde didn't seem to have noticed the 'honey' thrown his way and just took Alfred's hand

in his and walked towards the Pasta-section.

He held his hand. Their finger were intertwined. They were holding hands.

Alfred wanted to object, but decided to see where this would end.

He realized how strange it was that he already got so intimate with someone he just met.

Even worse, with a customer.

Whose name he didn't even know.

The name 'Alfred F. Jones' was clearly visible on his name tag, but he really wanted to know the guys name, to maybe stalk him on Facebook.

He stopped moving and waited for the little guy to bump into him.

Every touch he could get was a good one.

Was he already developing a crush?

Simply based on looks?

Well, the little man really was cute. With his bright hair and his fair skin and his cute nose, that he just wanted to poke and in his ugly sweater that looked way to big on him and his funny eyebrows and his voice, with the cute accent. Oh, that voice, that was ringing in his ears and getting louder and louder every second.

Just as he felt someone tug on his shirt did he realize that he was staring at the boy, grinning like an idiot.

Alfred laughed nervously and started to chew on his lips out of sheer nervousness.

''Erm...sorry, I was trying to remember where the Pasta-section is.''

Two bushy eyebrows were raised to stare at him and then only one was raised to scowl.

''We are right in front of it. There is a very large sign in front of your head and it says 'Pasta'.

Are you bloody kidding me?'' 

The American turned his head and recognized the sign. That was truly a lame excuse.

''Oh yes, glad you found it. What do you need? Maybe some Pasta''

A pout was added to the scowl and a blush to Alfred's face.

''Indeed, what a great idea, looking for pasta in the pasta-section''

Ouch. Was he acting this stupid?

Alfred decided to go all out, since the guy probably wouldn't buy at this store ever again after his

horrible performance.

''By the way dude, what's your name?''

He alarmed himself to be attentive and burn the name into his brain to look it up online as soon as possible. So now he already decided to stalk him? Oh well, Alfred was obviously in love.

''Why do you ask?''

Oh no, was that too forward? This time Alfred did slap himself in the face.

''I...It's Arthur, Arthur Kirkland. I life not to far from here and I go to the university near by''

Wow, that was a lot of information for screwing it up, so maybe he didn't after all.

''Nice to meet you Arthur, my name is Alfred F. Jones and I study at the same place. Now let's get you your food, don't want you to starve, dude!''

''O...Okay''

Alfred grabbed his hand again and they continued their journey through the store.

He got Arthur some pasta and a whole lot of stuff. And it never seemed to be from one of the lower shelves. And even if the shelf wasn't too high for Arthur, he still asked Alfred to get it.

And he always starred at him in awe when he did.

Strange.

After half and hour, Alfred was starting to get annoyed.

They stopped in front of a really large shelf and the little guy asked him to get him several things.

Things that didn't make sense. Things that wouldn't make up for the high-price they were costing.

Things that nobody in their right mind would cook with or need. Like denture cleanser.

''Are you making fun of me?''

Alfred turned around to face the person of his interest and scowled.

''No, why do you think so?''

To look more intimidating, and also a bit to impress him, Alfred crossed his arms in front of his chest and flexed his muscles.

"You've been asking for help finding things in the store I work in all afternoon and every time you do it's always something literally two feet away from you so now I'm starting to wonder if this is something you're doing on purpose.''

Arthur tried to answer him but he just managed to blush and point at Alfred's shirt.

The Americans gaze followed his and he looked at it as well.

''That's my shirt, what's wrong with it?''

The little Brit shifted under his gaze and started to mumble something in his sweater.

Alfred pricked up his ears but couldn't understand a word.

''Could you repeat that again?''

''I...I said, that every time you stretch to grab something, your shirt exposes your stomach and it's really...''

Blue eyes stared in a very red face and got bigger and bigger every second in anticipation.

''It's?''

''Hot.''

''Oh''

For a minute or two, nobody said a word. Then Alfred's hand grabbed Arthur's and he dragged him trough the whole store, until he reached a storeroom.

Arthur could only follow him, wondering what would happen next.

Alfred opened the door quickly and smashed him into the wall.

''So, hot, hm?''

The smaller guy only whimpered and tried to look away, but Alfred raised his chin with his finger and forced him to look into his beaming eyes.

''What is your sexuality?''

Arthur opened his mouth, making fish-like movements for a while, until answering.

''Gay''.

His voice was less than a whisper and his eyes went wide in shock as a hot pair of lips met his.

The first few seconds, he was too shocked to respond, but then he opened his mouth when Alfred licked over his bottom-lip and he kissed back.

Alfred would be surprised at his own eagerness, wouldn't he have been so busy touching each and every one of Arthur's tooth with the tip of his tongue.

The smaller guy tasted like tea. Just how much more British could he get?

And cuter. He was so cute, the way he mewled into the kiss, whimpering slightly when Alfred started to rub his knee into his crotch.

A small moan escaped Arthur's lips when Alfred took one of his small hands and held it on his abs.

Maybe the weird t-shirt wasn't so bad after all.


End file.
